How do I ... explain ... oh god wat

[LordKaT]

I put up a small 36" dish to see if I could receive RTN over the neighbors house. The dish is outside on the balcony mounted on a tripod (which is weighted down - no lag bolts allowed in a rented house!)

Well, I pointed the dish ... and didn't get a whole lot. I thought I had enough clearance from the neighbors roof. I fiddled a lot, couldn't get anything, and went inside for some dinner,

About an hour later, I get a knock on the door. It's my neighbor, and she's very upset that I have a satellite dish pointed at her house. Apparently - and I wasn't made aware of this until this evening - satellite dishes can be used to not only listen in on private conversations, but also to read minds, and set houses on fire.

"Oh god how did this get here I am not good with computer"

I tried to explain to her how satellite dishes worked, and how they concentrate microwave radiation to a small focal point, but the instant she heard "microwave radiation" she went bananas.

How do you respond to something like that?

Also: apparently she called the police (or she said she would). Its been 20 minutes, and they haven't shown up yet. If they do, any advice on how to get this settled?

 

[SatinKzo]

well, I would hope that common sense would prevail if the police actually did show up.

If not, well, ask to borrow some stuff to make smores for when she and or her house burst into flames.

 

[Zorak]

You've been discovered. Return to the Mother ship.......

 

[gillham]

That is good stuff. Hopefully if the neighbor does call it in they get dinged with filing a worthless report.

Print out the OTARD to counter-act the RETARD.

Installing Consumer-Owned Antennas and Satellite Dishes

 

[meinename]

I put up a small 36" dish to see if I could receive RTN over the neighbors house. The dish is outside on the balcony mounted on a tripod (which is weighted down - no lag bolts allowed in a rented house!)

Well, I pointed the dish ... and didn't get a whole lot. I thought I had enough clearance from the neighbors roof. I fiddled a lot, couldn't get anything, and went inside for some dinner,

About an hour later, I get a knock on the door. It's my neighbor, and she's very upset that I have a satellite dish pointed at her house. Apparently - and I wasn't made aware of this until this evening - satellite dishes can be used to not only listen in on private conversations, but also to read minds, and set houses on fire.

"Oh god how did this get here I am not good with computer"

I tried to explain to her how satellite dishes worked, and how they concentrate microwave radiation to a small focal point, but the instant she heard "microwave radiation" she went bananas.

How do you respond to something like that?

Also: apparently she called the police (or she said she would). Its been 20 minutes, and they haven't shown up yet. If they do, any advice on how to get this settled?

Always avoid the word "radiation". Stirs unwarranted panic in the less-educated folks.
I prefer "radio signal" or "radio-waves" or just plain "signal"
Lady is NUTS!
You'll never be able to assuage her "fears"
Spend some more time aiming the dish.
When you see her watching in fear out the windows, give the "I'm watching you" hand gesture, then a grandiose silent "LOL" or "ROFL" in case the other neighbors are watching.

Disclaimer: I do not actually recommend what I wrote above.
I have no idea what I'd do, but I'm dead sure of my diagnosis.

You'll never be able to assuage her "fears"
Spend some more time aiming the dish.

 

[tvropro]

People are brain dead and you have rights. Let her call the cops, they'll get a good chuckle out of it down at the station.

 

[eurosport]

Wait 'till she's outside.
Holler "Can ya' hold still a minute..??"
Pan the dish back and forth in her general direction
while hollering back toward your house..." Anything? ...I've almost got it!!!" :up

 

[tvropro]

Wait 'till she's outside.
Holler "Can ya' hold still a minute..??"
Pan the dish back and forth in her general direction
while hollering..."I've almost got it!!!" :up

ROFL :haha

 

[turbosat]

That's a good one. I woulda had to ask her where she got her information about setting things on fire, listening in on people inside their house, etc. Moons' getting full, they'll start popping out all over this week.

 

[Tron]

How do you respond to something like that?

Tell her to get lost and slam the door in her face.

Paint a giant smiley on the dish surface the next day using flat paint.

Problem solved ...

 

[beast37799]

yea if you can set things on fire with 1 that would be a cool trick but seriously id ingore her and hope the moon men will take her home soon lol

 

[Mike0616]

About an hour later, I get a knock on the door. It's my neighbor, and she's very upset that I have a satellite dish pointed at her house. Apparently - and I wasn't made aware of this until this evening - satellite dishes can be used to not only listen in on private conversations, but also to read minds, and set houses on fire.

Well, I think it was downright rude of you if you didn't offer to buy her a giant roll of aluminum foil at Costco to calm her fears. After all, you know that keeps people's thoughts from being read, don't you? (I was informed of by a neighbor who lives in this gated community I live in and no, I am NOT kidding about that!)

Let the whack-job call the police, they need a good laugh every once in a while, too.

 

[glater]

Must be the same lady from Texas that told the police that "the train swerved and hit my cadillac".

 

[avg1joe]

Just aim the dish somewhere else unless you're trying to get her goat.

If you are trying to get her goat and definitely want to meet the local cops, tell her that the dish can only see through certain materials. It goes through wood and vinyl but not nylon or rayon. Ask her to please wear the flannel number again tonight because you were so enthralled last night you forgot to hit the record button. Be prepared to run.

 

[LordKaT]

Just to update everyone: the police never came knocking at my door, and I still have the satellite dish pointed in the same spot it was last night.

I don't know if she was off her meds or what. Oh well, time to try and get RTN again. Maybe I'll put the dish on the back deck and see if I can clear the trees.

 

[marco916]

Sacramento House covered in aluminum

Well, I think it was downright rude of you if you didn't offer to buy her a giant roll of aluminum foil at Costco to calm her fears. After all, you know that keeps people's thoughts from being read, don't you? (I was informed of by a neighbor who lives in this gated community I live in and no, I am NOT kidding about that!)

Let the whack-job call the police, they need a good laugh every once in a while, too.

Mike, couple years ago here in Sacramento, this family did exactly that, covered the house with aluminum foil and sheet metal to protect them selves from radiation.
Here's the link on the article South Natomas Home Covered With Sheet Metal - Sacramento News Story - KCRA Sacramento

 

[swampman]

Well maybe I'm seeing this a little differently, and I know she just doesn't understand, but I think if I was trying to settle the nerves of my neighbor(a female at that), I definately would not have used terms like "microwave radiation" anywhere in the conversation. I don't think it could have been worse had you said "nuclear". But that's just me.

 

[FTABman0]

Well that has to be the funniest thing I have heard today! Buy her some R-Wrap so she can foil her head so you can't read her mind! Also, tell her that her private conversations are not private anymore! Tell her you are the Neighborhood Watch version of SETI! Just out listening for crime!

Some people are just ignorant to the point you feel like slapping them straight!

The aluminum & sheet metal link marco was a funny thing as well! Thanks for posting that bit of chuckle! :haha


K E V I N

 

[marco916]

Bigger Dish

I will laugh if the lady goes out and buys a huge C band dish and points the thing right back at you ..now that would be funny.

 

[LordKaT]

I will laugh if the lady goes out and buys a huge C band dish and points the thing right back at you ..now that would be funny.

Maybe I'll hang a chickn in front of the dish to prove it doesn't set things on fire