My epic all-night Paraclipse odyssey...

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Tron

SatelliteGuys Master
Original poster
May 6, 2005
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Metro New Orleans, LA
As I sit here contemplating this post, I wonder if I really might need therapy. I mean, FTA is an addictive hobby, but I think I might have taken things a bit far this morning... 9/10 of a mile TOO far. Where to begin? I guess I should begin at the beginning.

It all started seven hours ago. I was on my way home from a late night feast at Taco Bell. I was going to head home and get some work done on the computer. It was about 11:00 p.m. Central, and I was on the last leg of my trip home through the 'burbs. Then I saw it. What was it? IT was an eight-foot Paraclipse dish, abandoned for the trash along with piles of shrubbery (Confederate Jasmine vines, to be exact) and an old chain-link fence.

To give some background on this particular dish, I've had my eyes on it for a couple of years now. It was mounted in a backyard near the fence. I've watched as the vines took hold on the fence, then on the dish. From time to time, I've been tempted to ask the owner if I could have the dish, but never got around to it. Besides, I'm not very keen about knocking on a stranger's door and going through that whole process.

Well, tonight as I passed the house, I noticed the fence, vines, and DISH were GONE! I quickly looked around, and saw the pile of debris put out for the garbage. On came the brakes (actually, I had to go around the block and come back), and I parked, got out, and surveyed the situation. The dish was sandwiched in between vines and fence, a real mess to be sure. After about an hour of untangling and breaking vines and fence material, I got the dish out. Buttonhook was bent at a 90 degree angle. Mesh was in rather poor condition, both from the vines and from tearing the dish down. The dish frame itself was in good shape, no corrosion, and still very shiny :) I made the decision that this dish was going to be saved.

I drove home (9/10 of a mile from where the dish was) to pick up some tools. Grabbed a socket set and a very large, high-torque adjustable wrench, and drove back. First thing I did was to remove the feedhorn/LNB assembly. Chaparral feedhorn with an Echostar 25 degree C-band LNB and polarotor. Nothing special, but I took that first. Next step was to remove the heavy part, which is, of course, the actuator assembly. I dreaded this, thinking the bolts would be rusted frozen. However, with a bit of effort, I managed to loosen one bolt with the high-torque wrench which allowed me to remove the entire actuator assembly. That went in the trunk of the car, along with the feedhorn.

Now for the dish itself. No way was this dish going to fit IN the car. I thought about on top, but I was worried about the weight (the thing was still very heavy) and the car paint job. I had my cell phone on me, and called friends with access to pickup trucks. Nobody awake. NO WAY am I going to let this dish go into the back of a garbage truck (not sure it would have fit anyway...) So I did the only thing I could do... drove home with the car, and walked back to the dish site on foot. The plan was to "roll" the dish home, staying on grass along the shoulder of the road wherever possible.

Walking back to the dish from home took about 20 minutes, no big deal. But the walk home would be much longer, much harder, and much more challenging. It was VERY hot and humid, as it always is down here. When I left home it was about 1:30 a.m. :eek: When I got back to the dish, it was 10 till 2. I started rolling it down the street, one block at a time, stopping periodically to catch my breath. This thing was still very heavy, and it took elbow grease to keep it rolling straight. I kept running into low hanging trees, street signs, traffic signs, and street lights. In many cases, there was no grass, only concrete. I had to roll it across the concrete, which made WAY too much noise for that time of night, with people trying to sleep. Finally, I got it home. It was 2:30 a.m. Not bad. Then I noticed something. No standard mount! The mount for the dish was still back there, on the pole, and that had to be retrieved!

I grabbed the large wrench and drove back again, fearing the worse... that the bolts would be frozen to the pole, which I would never be able to pick up and put in the car (it probably weighed at least 500 pounds with the concrete). Fortunately, the bolts came loose rather easily, and I was able to put the mount into the trunk of my car. This mount is a square "tube", about four feet long, which bolts on over the pipe which is cemented into the ground. At the top of this square tube is an angled, pivoting mount that attaches to the actuator assembly. Without these parts, I would never be able to get the dish working properly.

Whew! Well, if you read this far, I hope it was an enjoyable little story. Now I've gotta get some sleep :rolleyes: Hopefully I can post some pics tomorrow....

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz........
 
:D

I got a 10.5 footer yesterday...I'll swap ya....:)

Although the dish I have isn't much good for other than the mount and some scrap, its bent and dented up, plus missing a panel. But a very nice mount with stainless bolts.

That sounds like some of the odysseys I get into.

WTG, nice thinking.:up
 
Great story. Now go get some professional help :)

That's nothing. I brought him a couple extra P* dishes I had...we met in a WalMart parking lot at night, I was in a hawaiian shirt and Panama Hat, smoking a cigar, he pulls up, we unload....should have SEEN the looks we got... :)

But then it IS New Orleans where anything goes...so it was all good...:up
 
just goes to show ya

I can just imagine what the police would've said, if they ran across you rolling your garbage down the street at that time of morning!
Tron: "But officer, it was just laying there in the trash, begging to be rescued!"
Officer: "Sure son, you'all come along down to the station, now."
"We'll get this all sorted out in the morning."

And the moral of this story is, if you'd just asked for the dish the week (month?) before, you could have had it in the day time, and maybe the receiver that went with it , too!
Ya might have even yanked out the pole and taken that along.
 
That's wanting a paraclipse really bad! I don't really need it but know where one is, not sure of the size since its so far off the road I can't really guess. But I can see it, and looks like its just fine but pointed almost at horizon. May have to stop and see about it soon. But I doubt I would try walking down the road with one lol. Those big cottonmouths like to crawl around too much for me.
 
This is how strong Paraclipse advertised them to be:

Al
 

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That's nothing. I brought him a couple extra P* dishes I had...we met in a WalMart parking lot at night, I was in a hawaiian shirt and Panama Hat, smoking a cigar, he pulls up, we unload....should have SEEN the looks we got... :)

But then it IS New Orleans where anything goes...so it was all good...:up

What happened ..................
You forgot the night vision goggles.

Meeting someone in a parking lot always raises suspicion , I once picked up a STB at a Burger King and felt the watchfull eyes of the Drive -thru cars .
 
I love your story Tron!!

Sounds like something I would have done.

You've got it as bad as I do. I know where there is an 8 foot Paraclipse right now. Makes me want to go out and get it tonight. :D

Good job, and don't worry about what people think. It is only important what you think!!!

I am anxiously awaiting the pictures.

Fred
 
Hahaha, you pulled an all nighter with a dish but, not quite the same type dish that some old movies are refering to..

Great story..
 
Sounds like the time I was getting a 10 footer down the street. We put it in the big wagon with the dish facing straight up and drug it down the street. The cars were trying to pass us and giving us dirty looks. It wasn't 2am, I wouldn't have the nerve to do that in any neighborhood! I'd either have the cops chasing me or someone would have a gun pulled on me for making all the racket in their front yard.
 
This is how strong Paraclipse advertised them to be:

Al
I won't try that with mine, but I do buy the well-built marketing claim. The only sign of corrosion is on some of the bolts themselves, which are (apparently) steel. Another thing I like about the construction is that the mesh is clamped on instead of bolted or riveted. Makes it much easier to change the mesh (which I am going to have to do :) )
 
Sounds like the time I was getting a 10 footer down the street. We put it in the big wagon with the dish facing straight up and drug it down the street. The cars were trying to pass us and giving us dirty looks. It wasn't 2am, I wouldn't have the nerve to do that in any neighborhood! I'd either have the cops chasing me or someone would have a gun pulled on me for making all the racket in their front yard.

I would have done the deed after sunrise, but garbage collection around here sometimes occurs at 4 a.m.... In this case, "garbage" collection occurred a bit sooner :D I thought about a wagon, but don't have one. It really was a situation where the only way to get the job done was the way I did it.

Also, I would have preferred another method to get the dish home, since rolling it scraped the outside edges of the frame pretty badly. Nothing that will affect performance, but I'll probably end up sanding the edges down to make it look better. At least the dish didn't go into a garbage truck and get crushed.

Too much rain today to get out and play with it, so I'll try to get the pictures tomorrow... I will need to replace the mesh, but that doesn't look to be difficult if I can find the material.
 
Tron,

I told my wife about your late night adventure, basically to point out to her that there are people here that have a way worse addiction to this "hobby" than I do.

You know what she had the nerve to say?

"That's something you'd do."

So much for that PR attempt (and what's worse, is she might be right, but wasn't suppose to know)!
 
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making the most . . .

You know what she had the nerve to say?
"That's something you'd do."
I'd take it as a compliment, and just say, "Thanks dear, you know me so well.".
Then smile real big!

... whats so great about the Paraclipse?
i see them at the junkyard all the time?
... and where might that be?
We'll all be over right away.
If you'd like to help us, we'll buy the pizza! :hungry:
 
up here in northern canada in the 80's it was the only way we got good tv ,so i see so many cband around peoples homes and at the dump.
a person just needs to ask and they can have them.(lots of Paraclipse)
 
not to be r but whats so great about the Paraclipse?i see them at the junkyard all the time?
Oh Man.... are you kidding? In the Day, I wanted one of those 16' Paraclipse so bad. The only reason I don't have one is, I couldn't afford it, but I would still love to have one. I know where an 8' (looks like?) Paraclipse is at, the house is vacant and the dish is pointing north. I've thought about trying to find the owner to see about it, but it still wouldn't be a 16'er.... Oh well, I can still dream......

Al
 
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