Michael Jackson to Buy Voom!!!

rollerfink

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Mar 1, 2004
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Pop Star and Alleged Child Molester To Purchase Satellite Service from Cablevision

Neverland, Ca.--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Jan. 31, 2005--Michael Jackson (NASDAQ: CANDYPOCKETS) announced today that he has agreed to purchase the Voom satellite service from Rainbow DBS Co., a subsidiary of Cablevision Systems Corporation (NYSE: CVC), for $72 million and a monkey named Daryl.

Specifically, Jackson has agreed to purchase all Voom programming and Voom's development, sales, and distribution operations. The sale includes the continuation of service to over 30,000 current Voom customers.

"It will be a seamless transition for Voom customers," said Jackson. "The only difference will be a couple of new channels."

When probed for further information on the new channels, Jackson giggled softly and touched his genitals.

A spokesperson for Cablevision indicated that one of the new channels will be "WildChild" -- a high definition channel dedicated to adult/child relationship themed programming. Another channel mentioned during discussions between the two parties was "PlasticHD" -- a high definition channel that examines "the glory and the gory" of plastic surgery.

An industry insider, speaking on condition of anonymity, speculates that Jackson's purchase of Voom may be an attempt at concealing millions of dollars within a flailing enterprise in order to avoid massive liability in potential civil suits relating to his child molestation charges. Not true, say Jackson's camp. "He just likes sparkly things."

The transaction is subject to review by the Federal Communications Commission and other regulatory agencies.
 
Michael is just buying the Satellite. Elvis has purchased the rest of the company including the subs. 32 channels of nothing but hi-def Elvis movies. Hey, if Graceland can make money why not this venture.
 
bradley said:
I gather NamblaHD isn't far behind as well.


Eric Cartman will be that channel's spokesman, and Mr.Jackson will dedicate a channel to his child named Blanket.
 
there was a reason anakin went over to the dark side. and it lives at neverland ranch.
 
I heard Walmart is a big investor too because both Walmart and Michael Jackson have boy's pants half off.
 

3rd world installs nightmare!!!

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