Consumer Competency Questioned
It seems everyone has forgotten the most serious technical problem ever
faced by consumers -- the ubiquitous flashing 12:00 on VCRs around the
world. Despite millions of complaints by hapless VCR owners, electronics
manufacturers continued to replicate the design flaw, causing millions of
users to tear their hair out in frustration.
One victim of the flashing 12:00 syndrome was quoted as saying "I've tried
watching movies, but that flashing 12:00 was so darn distracting I just gave
it up and went fishing. Our kids have tons of movies they are unable to enjoy,
so they just go outside to play. It's so sad."
After receiving thousands of complaints about the flashing 12:00 VCR design
flaw, the CEA announced an investigation would be opened into charges that
most electronics manufacturers were oblivious to consumer needs in failing to
address the issue.
After inteviewing groups of consumers, design engineers, manufacturers and
retailers, the CEA concluded that the root cause of the flashing 12:00 problem
was that the average consumer was simply unable to understand the most basic
owner manual instructions and, therefor, is unqualified to operate any consumer
products more complicated than a toaster.
The CEA, in a press-release, said it will partner with DeVry College, a nationwide
chain of technical schools, to develop special courses to instruct consumers in the
proper use of their electronic products. Course offerings will include:
VCR 101 - How to tell time with your VCR
DVD 101 - Playing with your discs like frizbees
TV - 110 - Hooking up a "Rabbit-ear(s)"
DBS 120 - How to call for technical support
C-Band* - Alien signals and what they really mean (course conducted by S.E.T.I)
*Graduate level only, some prerequisite courses may apply
Those completing special education courses will receive completion certificates
in specific categories suitable for framing. Consideration is now being given to the
requirement that consumers show the appropriate certificate before purchasing
electronic products.