What If GM Was Run Like MS?

DodgerKing

SatelliteGuys Master
Original poster
Nov 14, 2007
16,776
27
SoCal
For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated,

'If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.'

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating
:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):

  1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash........Twice a day.
  2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
  3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
  4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
  5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
  6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single 'This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation' warning light.
  7. I love the next one!!!
  8. The airbag system would ask 'Are you sure?' before deploying.
  9. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
  10. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
  11. You'd have to press the 'Start' button to turn the engine off.
PS - I'd like to add that when all else fails, you could call 'customer service' in some foreign country and be instructed in some foreign language how to fix your car yourself!!!!
 
Don't know if this was posted before or if others have read it somewhere else.

Just thought it was funny and both MS and Apple folks would probably get a kick out of it.
 
An oldie but a goodie. Of course if cars were only $25 we wouldn't mind most of those problems ;)
 
Of course you are looking at a 100 year old product vs a 10 year old product. The first 10 years of the automobile were not the more reliable either.
 
...and the line about Macintosh cars being able to drive on only 5% of the roads? It's more like 10% nowadays...
 
Still the only good period of automotive reliability was from the mid 50's till the first oil crisis and then it all went downhill and when the auto industry decided it would be a good idea to put computers in cars that slide went even faster which is why the list that GM put out happens as much as it does.
 
You guys are taking this way to seriously. It is just a joke.
:) It's just one that some of us old farts have seen years before. One thing that dates this joke is the "Crash two times a day" line. Most Windows machines I have experience with do not crash or "BSoD". After Windows XP SP2, most PCs only need to be rebooted for monthly Windows Updates.

Of course, #10 is still true. Each release of Windows reinforces McCoy's observation from "Star Trek: The Motion Picture": "I know Engineers; they love to change things!" Going from Windows 2000 to Windows XP/2003 to Vista requires the user to relearn how to do certain operations. (From what I've seen, though, it looks like the move from Vista to Windows 7 won't be as big a shift as going from XP to Vista.)

I suppose we could add #12: Only the high-end models would have the hardware to support "Transparent" Windows... :D
 
The first time I saw that list I was using Windows 3.1 (even before I updated to 3.11 so I could actually network!). I had recently given up on Mafnaviox's GeoWorks which was still my favorite DOS shell. Nothing like having a complete operating system that ran on a 3.5" disk and never crashed!

Of course, at the time I was using a blisteringly fast 286sx25 processor. The computer was dirt cheep too. Only $1100!!!!

See ya
Tony
 
:) It's just one that some of us old farts have seen years before. One thing that dates this joke is the "Crash two times a day" line. Most Windows machines I have experience with do not crash or "BSoD". After Windows XP SP2, most PCs only need to be rebooted for monthly Windows Updates.

Of course, #10 is still true. Each release of Windows reinforces McCoy's observation from "Star Trek: The Motion Picture": "I know Engineers; they love to change things!" Going from Windows 2000 to Windows XP/2003 to Vista requires the user to relearn how to do certain operations. (From what I've seen, though, it looks like the move from Vista to Windows 7 won't be as big a shift as going from XP to Vista.)

I suppose we could add #12: Only the high-end models would have the hardware to support "Transparent" Windows... :D
I have never experienced most of those things listed, but still thought it was funny
 
I have never experienced most of those things listed, but still thought it was funny

How young are you?

Does anyone remember using a Rat Shack Trash80 Model 1 with the programs on a cassette player. Take 30 minutes to load a program to convert temperatures and have it crash 28 minutes into the process.
 
First was a plastic binary "computer" for me. Then an RCA COSMAC VIP with an 1802 CPU, which I still have. Then a couple of overclocked Heathkit H89 machines. All these computers were homebuilt by me. Then a Z90 for use in Navy. Then after 1981, it became all PC compatibles, including one pre-sigma 80386.

But the thread begs the question: As smart phones & the internet fill most personal PC needs, will MS follow GM downhill?
 
Maybe some of the computers in your vehicles have MS software running on them.
 

Users Who Are Viewing This Thread (Total: 0, Members: 0, Guests: 0)

Who Read This Thread (Total Members: 1)

Latest posts