**SPOILERS**
Show opens with Vince and Coach backstage talking about the paternity test. Vince says he had one last fling in the 70s with a black woman. Coach thought it may be him.
Batista & Kane beat Khali & Finlay.
John Cena beat Carlito with the STFU. After the match, Randy Orton attacks Cena. He gives a nasty RKO on a steel chair on the floor. Cena is helped back by officials.
MVP announces he has a heart condition and cannot compete. Evander Holyfield is MVP's replacement. Michael Buffer comes out and does the introductions. Holyfield and Matt Hardy fight to a 2nd round. MVP comes in and pushes Holyfield for not listening to him. Holyfield knocks out MVP to end the match.
CM Punk & Boogeyman beat John Morrison & Big Daddy V.
Vince McMahon and Coach come to the ring. Coach says he has it narrowed down to a few. First, Eugene comes out and calls Vince "daddy" and gives him a big hug. Next, Balls Mahoney comes out. He says he could have balls for a son. Vince screams out "I have no balls", which leads to the crowd chanting "Vince has no balls". Next, Melina comes out. Vince says she couldn't be his daughter because (whisper to Coach) with Coach replying "Eww, thats gross!" Melina says if she is his daughter, she will sue him for every penny he has. Finally, Coach says Vince doesn't want to know the last person. At this point, the crowd is chanting for Kennedy!! Then... and out comes Stone Cold Steve Austin. After a good ten minutes of b.s., Austin kicks Vince in the balls, stunners Coach, drinks some beers, then stunners both Vince and Coach.
End of show.